A TIME TO YAWN

Posted at 8:12 p.m. ET

This is the big stuff.  The Dems really mean it this year.  They're rolling out the heavy artillery, as the AP tells us:

An Indiana railroader, an Iowa mother and a Michigan truck driver are getting a moment at the Democratic convention to help portray Barack Obama as the people's champion and counter GOP characterizations of him as an out-of-touch celebrity.

The idea is for these ''real people,'' as the campaign calls them, to share personal stories about why they are supporting the Democratic presidential candidate and how they think he will help folks like them and the more than 20 million expected to be watching the convention at home.

Question:  What's an unreal person?  Are there unreal persons running around?  Should we arrest them?  Study them?

Question:  Have any leaders of the Democratic Party ever met a railroader, an Iowa mother or a truck driver?  I mean, you don't find them at meetings in Aspen.

Question:  Will the Dems know how to feed these people?  You know, tofu and herbal tea might not make it.

The real people will, of course, speak directly from the heart, from the soul, from the depths of their rotten experiences under BUSH! 

Well, not exactly...

Professional speechwriters are helping prepare their remarks, timed to about three minutes each. And just like any senator or other VIP speaker, an assigned staff member will oversee their schedules and logistical movements, including media interviews, speech coaching and on-stage rehearsals.

Just real, down-to-earth folk.  With a staff of thousands.

Real people also will be featured at an event Tuesday alongside Michelle Obama and the nation's female Democratic governors to talk about the economic problems facing women.

What happens if one of the unreal people gets in and asks why we can't drill for more oil in our own country?  Will she be put into the unreal persons detention center?

Finally...

Besides ''real people,'' Obama's campaign and the convention committee on Tuesday announced more names who will speak at the convention, including former President Carter; Sen. John Kerry, the 2004 presidential nominee; various Democratic senators and governors, and union leaders.

Now I know what they mean by unreal people.  What a ratings bonanza.

August 19, 2008.